Melinda Mathis Hardin’s Response

I recently posted a video of Melinda Mathis Hardin singing at the Shelby County Community Theatre. It was a special evening and the responses were very positive. After my blog, Melinda wrote about how important that evening was for her. Here is what she said:

(“Reginald Bareham” is my Facebook handle…at the end of this post, I include a Video link to her performance. Click on the link or the picture at the very bottom)

……..Melinda:

“When I saw that my dear friend Reginald Bareham shared this on his blog today, I got knots in my stomach. Gosh, I remember this night like it was yesterday and also like it was at least a decade longer than the timestamp shows. I think this was my second performance sober, so I was intimately acquainted with full on apprehension. I must’ve made 748 divots in the theater’s galley kitchenette, pacing with frenzy, projecting worst case scenarios—from tripping on stage to completely forgetting the words. I literally almost ducked out the back door just before I went on. I’m not even sure how I arrived in front of the microphone, because there’s no exaggeration in telling you that I could.not.feel.my.legs while simultaneously regretting my choice in shoes. I felt like I had actual holes in my body that surely exposed my fears. And yet, Lynne McReynolds Chenault struck the keys. It was go time. 

Today, I hesitantly pressed play on the video link Reg sent and held my breath. My ears highlighted every flaw, of course. I’m sure you can hear them, too. H O W E V E R, then I remembered the confidence that built up within me as I approached the end of song. The moment I knew I was going to survive to the end having remembered the lyrics and still standing, I was able to breath. (Admittedly, there was only maybe 12 seconds left in the whole thing.)

This song reminds me of a season I’ve recently walked through (with – truth be told- steps still to go). Knots. Nerves. Never ending reel of worst case scenarios. But there was no option of a back door exit.  And it wasn’t a performance. Life handed me an unfamiliar score, a blank page with no lyrics, notes that weren’t within my range to hit and said, “What will you make of this?” At first, I couldn’t feel my legs. Hell, I couldn’t feel my body. I was paralyzed by pain and the only physical sensation was panic. And yet, simultaneously, I felt an underlying peace. (I’ve been astounded by the lesson of how many things can be true at the same time.) Slowly….but surely….I’ve begun to emerge. I am finding the words to the song my soul has longed to hear…sometimes I can even sing it. I’m hitting notes outside of my range and turns out, I can belt ‘em out most days now. I’m still breathing. I’m still standing. And like the end of this song, I’ll finish stronger than I started.”

Here is the Vimeo Video data:

Here is the Video Link: